Saturday, October 24, 2009


so, why won't it click? it clicked once and i did well. something is blocking the way. something deep down inside. no one else forces me. it is draining me emotionally, physically, draining, draining, draining. no one says a word, no one says what they are thinking. click, please click.

Sunday, October 04, 2009


i am frustrated at life, myself, insurance, life, myself!!! i am now at my highest wt. ever. i got very ill from the liquid diet. liver was crazy out of normal. now back to normal.
see a new dr. who gives me the same speech as the other dr. "if you want to lose all the weight you need to you need surgery" "have you considered it?" CONSIDERED IT! shit i have been begging my job to cover weight loss surgery for about 8 years now.
i wrote a letter to my benefits department with the help of some very close friends. here it is :

To whom it may concern,
I am writing to you today to inquire why I, as a 17 year xxx employee, do not have the opportunity for gastric bypass, or any kind of weight loss surgery, because it is not covered under our insurance plan. HealthLink does cover weight loss surgery, our HR department decided it was not an option.
Weight loss surgery being covered would be an opportunity to claim a better, healthy life for me and allow me to be an example for my patients. I don't understand why an employer would choose not to allow their employee this benefit and risk loosing me as a loyal and experienced employee because of complications from being morbidly overweight.
Our mission at xxx is to take exceptional care of our patients. What about the employees?
The cost to xxx is a drop in the bucket compared to the out of pocket hit to my budget. To pay for this surgery out of pocket it is $24,000, per Dr. xx's office. If I were disabled and on medicare or worked for Washington University I would be covered. Why the discrimination?
I have been told by 2 primary care physicians Dr. xx and Dr. xx that weight loss surgery will be the only way I can lose the weight I need to prevent what is assuredly to come: hypertension, diabetes, peripheral vascular problems, knee and or hip replacements.
Why not be proactive and help me and I am assured many others be healthier?
Thank you for your time and I look forward to your response.

i reached a very kind soul in the HR department who helped me send it to "whom it may concern". no answer after week one. she then sent it to the vp. took another week to hear back. bad news.
here's friday's letter:

Dear x,

I am in receipt of your email inquiring about the lack of coverage for gastric bypass surgery in xxx’s medical plan.
xxx HealthCare does care for its employees – each and every one of them. For the past several years, gastric bypass and lap band surgeries have been brought up during our annual benefits plan review process. These surgeries are extensively reviewed/researched by our internal benefits team as well as our medical plan administrator, UMR. The review includes cost/benefit analysis and the overall impact to every employee and family member covered by our medical plans. Dr. x has also been consulted to provide information.
We have consistently found that the cost of the surgeries, the risk of complications and the expenses associated with those complications are cost prohibitive. At this time, xxx HealthCare and the employees and their family members who are covered in the medical plan are not able to absorb the combination of costs and risks.
xxx will continue to examine and analyze the cost/benefits of gastric bypass and lap band surgeries. Should you wish to discuss this further, please do not hesitate to contact me.
xxx HealthCare
Director, Benefits